He said: "I try to get out there a couple times a year, but it's hard sometimes and in the Winter it's really hard. Cause that's when we lost him, in the Winter. Neither his mother or I were happy that he chose the Army over college, but we had to let him go and just trusted that he would come home safe. We worried about that endless war every day and the only times we could really breath was when he sent us an email message, usually short, but proof that he was still there and OK and that much closer to coming back home. But then, one week we didn't hear anything and I guess we knew. That didn't make anything any easier. It was still a shock. I thought his mother would die in my arms, her grief was so deep. It's going on three years and I always think that it will, in time, be less painful. But it never is. It's always the same and it's always dark. especially in Winter."

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